From: gwb
To: Hank Blakely
Sent: Saturday, December 16, 2000
Subject: Supreme at last! Thank God Almighty, supreme at last!

Whooooeeee, Man, and hot damn! I did it! I am da' man, da' Prez! The big cheese at last! And after only six years in public office, too!

The Supreme Court has collusively proved I am the winner! Ever'body's been congratulatin' me and makin' all kind of funny comments. Karen made one that ever'body laughed at - somethin' about how funny it was that the majority was so concerned with equal protection and all the time there's Tony Scalia with TWO votes!

I don't think I got that one, though.

It's strange to think that jus' a little while ago we was all feelin' real down. Jeb said that we'd have to go to "plan C" and send up two sets of electors, on account of how the recount was bound to go against us. Hell, Jeb said, he'd send up ten sets if he had to.

I mind how Jeb always said if you lose it means you didn't play dirty enough.

Oh, funny story 'bout Jeb. T'other day I come up on him while he was practicin' writin' his officical signature. He must have had a lot of trouble with it, 'cause there was copies of it on little pieces of paper all over his desk and on the floor, an' jus' ever'where. But when I looked closer, I saw his mistake. He'd wrote the damn things wrong! Instead of "Jeb" he'd wrote "George W" - My name! It even looked a lot like my signature! At first he seemed kind'a upset that I'd found him out. But when he saw that I was jus' laughin' at him, he started laughin' too. Hell, if anythin' he was laughin more than I was. Then he joked about how, if anythin' happened to me, at least there'd always be someone to sign all them laws and things.

I can't get over how he made such a mistake, him bein' the smart one and all. Silly ol' Jeb, ain't he a caution?

A much pleasured,
W